40th G-View: Jinki;Extend

Remember when I mentioned a week ago that I forgot to post a review a while back? Well, here it is at long last, another angry review.

Hello and welcome to G-Views, where SoL reigns supreme, moe is respected and Dokuro-chan sucks poopie. It’s been a while since I reviewed a bad anime and I think the time has come to once again step into crappy territory. So join meas we dive into the lamefest that is Jinki; Extend.

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95th G-View: Stellvia of the Universe

Hello and welcome to G-Views, where SoL reigns supreme, moe is respected and Dokuro-chan sucks poopie. Before I begin, I’d like to pick up a very specific voodoo doll and stand in front of a piranha filled fish tank, pour some blood on it and get ready to let it loose once I’m finished. Read on to find out who this doll represents the “Stellvia of thee Universe” G-View, or just “Stellvia” for short.

Genres: action, adventure, comedy, drama, romance, science fiction
Themes: mecha, space
Number of episodes: 26
G-Rating: 7.5/10

Plot Summary: The year is 2356 A.D. – 189 years after a distant supernova caused a global catastrophe that wiped out 99% of the world population. To keep track on all space activities, mankind has built colossal space stations called “foundations” all over the Solar System. After passing the Space Academy entrance exams, Shima Katase embarks to the Earth-based foundation Stellvia to fulfill her dream of seeing the galaxy and to prevent another interstellar catastrophe from destroying Earth.

As far as storyline and settings go, it’s a pretty basic sci-fi show with multiple interesting crises for our heroes to deal with after they finish their training and are ready to go on real missions such as preventing the “second wave” from destroying all life in the universe and later on a classic invasion plot. The invasion plot is interesting in the sense that it might keep you guessing for a while before its true origin is revealed. Throw in some minor political conflicts after the 1st arc ends and that’s about all you need to know. Oh don’t worry about the amount of politics. It plays a very minor role. It’s not as extravagant and confusing as say, Gundam Wing’s, just your typical human disagreements and mistrust yada yada yada. Now during the training sessions which also acts as the form of education, references to things such as “Theory of knowledge”, “Creativity Action and Service”, and “Extended Essays” are made. So you may just learn something from this show. Who knows? Expect many influences of child prodigies and gifted to take part in many decisions made early on.

The animation: It’s split into 2 parts: The 1st part is the character art. The way the characters are drawn is solid. Not ecchi at all unless you count some large breasted girls as ecchi but their bazookas aren’t that disturbing to anti ecchi nitpickers. Since most of the characters are teenagers, there’s not much I can say about their appearances. It’s up to the viewers to decide whether they’re cool or not in this one. The 2nd topic of animation lies in the CGI effects for the spaceships and UFOs, the outer space setting etc. Basically everything that takes place in space itself. for the time this show came out, it’s not bad. It’s fluid and not bothersome to the eyes. It isn’t spectacular either but good enough to keep me from changing the channel.

The music: Space Opera style. Nuff said. the OP and EDs are decent but nothing memorable in my opinion. Still, the soundtrack does its job and sets the mood when necessary and that’s what matters.

The characters: This is another one of those character driven shows where it’s they who will dictate the viewers’ interest in the show for the most part.
Now then, the time has finally come to reveal the culprit behind my pain and desire to create a voodoo doll in his image and hopefully said doll’s mutilation would have come true in the anime itself…Kouta Otoyama.
If you don’t want to be spoiled, skip the spoiler tag and read on to the other characters. Take my word for it, EVERYONE on the show is more interesting and worth watching than Kouta. If you’re intrigued, open the spoiler tag. Expect some strong language. You’ve been warned.

FUCK KOUTA OTOYAMA. He’s dull, boring, lifeless, uninteresting, beyond generic, lame, retarded, has a shitty smile, is an arrogant fuckface, and last but not least, one of the worst male leads I have ever seen in my animeniac career. you want to know how bad he is? Some of my female colleagues who enjoy romance anime and are much more knowledgeable in romance than I am, even they were baffled and disgusted by this asshole of a boy.

Shima/Kouta. There is no reason for this pairing to exist. There is no chemistry, no empathy, no nothing. It is a complete fabrication on the part of the writers. HE is a complete fabrication on the part of the writers. He has no personality, no emotion, nothing.

I lost count of the times when Shipon was in pain…fearful…lonely and confused…and every time, Kouta took the opportunity to display his complete and utter lack of perceptible emotion or sense of understanding. He was never there for her, not once. He never comforted her, never put his arms around her, never encouraged her, never shared in her disquiet. He showed his “support” by A) leaving her alone, and/or B)being off doing something else.

Even when asked point blank why he supposedly “loves” Shima, he doesn’t come up with a viable answer. Not only right then, when the question is asked, but ever. He has no good reason. Nor does she have ANY reason to feel anything for him. The reason, in both cases, is because the writers decided they would be a pair.

Some of you who saw this show might say, oh but he’s the chosen one who will help save the universe along with Shipon. No…no…NO! I don’t care if he’s the chosen one, he’s too pathetic to even exist! The fact that he’s a cliche character with deceased parents and a loving older sister doesn’t help make him interesting either. He’s THAT bad.
I’ve seen many anime comedies with pointless romantic developments added to them, but they were tolerable enough compared to the asinine, uninspired, spiteful, unrealistic, unbelievable, fucked up pairing of Shipon/Kouta. I think it could even be classified as a B-Rated low-budget  Chick Flick type romance. It is THAT bad.
It hurt me, it genuinely hurt me watching these two together. the pairing should never have existed and should have instead been left to rot inside the minds of the assholes who thought this would actually work.

A motherfucking waste of flesh, that’s what Kouta is.

So, who was there for Shipon? Who always offered hugs, gentle words, or tough love, as the situation warranted? Who was a fountain of soothing sympathy, cheer and companionship? Arisa.

The main female protagonist, Shima ‘Shipon’ Katase, is a sweetie. She reminds me of Akari Kanzaki from BAV. She joins Stellvia foundation’s space program so that she could “see the stars while looking forward, rather than having to look up”. In the beginning, she fluctuates between complete confidence in her abilities and believing she couldn’t do anything. The series depicts her as extremely diligent, although she is also a natural genius. She’s kind of a harmless perfectionist at first, who eventually learns to understand her mistakes and realizes that you don’t have to be perfect or else fail, just get up and try again till you get it right.

Arisa Glennorth: Oh dearest Arisa. Your awesomeness knows no bounds. Believe me when I say that she has a very powerful voice. A true hero and best Shipon’s best friend. One of my favorite characters on the show for numerous reasons. trust me when I say that having a best friend like her is a blessing.

There’s one last character I must rave about before ending this review and that is Joy Jones, colloquially known as Jojo. Oh yeah, of all the male characters on the show, this guy is DA MAN! My word, in terms of romance, the one he gets involved in later on is perfect. The pickup lines, the sincerity, the humor, the fun factor, the development between Jojo and his lucky lady, everything about it is so simple, it’s perfect. Why can’t anime male leads be like Jojo? It’s like…with the leads, they end up like cardboard, but with the secondary characters they can actually get it right. Screw you, Kouta. Jojo is a thousand times friendlier, sweeter, cuter, and more personable than you’ll ever be. Compared to a certain other pairing on the show, Jojo and his lady save the show compared to the drudgery of the other one which I will stop addressing now.

Like I said above, every single character, young and old is more interesting than Kouta. If it weren’t for that dork, I would have a given this great show a higher rating.

As for the English dub, it’s okay. nothing to write home about. Stick with the JP subs.

In conclusion: that’s pretty much all I have to say. If you can endure the atrocity and waste of flesh that is Kouta, give this one a try. Definitely enjoyable sans the cow dung.

89th G-View: Kannazuki no Miko

Hello and welcome to G-Views, where SoL reigns supreme, moe is respected and Dokuro-chan sucks poopie. Well, I’ve been wanting to review this show for a long time and I think that the time has finally come. Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, one of the most legendary yuri anime in history, Kannazuki no Miko.

Genres: action, drama, magic, psychological, romance, supernatural, shoujo-ai
Themes: mecha, yuri
Objectionable content: Significant (bloody violence and/or swearing and/or nudity)
Number of episodes: 13
G-Rating: 6/10 as an action mech anime, 10/10 for ChiMeko.

Plot Summary: The highborn Himemiya Chikane is cool and aloof, the perfect young lady of good breeding. Kurusegawa Himeko is devoted to her, and secretly her friend. Their lives are undisturbed in their school, until an ancient evil suddenly rears its head. To combat it, Chikane and Himeko must take on the roles of shrine maidens of the Moon and Sun.

Let me get this out of the way first. As far as an action anime with mechs go, this one just plain sucks. The villains are generic and uninteresting, the mechs themselves aren’t memorable and completely out of place in an anime like this and the action scenes are too short. You could have pretty much just had the heroes and villains fight each other without mechs. Would have made the action portion less ridiculous and slightly more tolerable.

Now as for ChiMeko…
It could not be more amazing, enthralling, fulfilling.  The whole series is about the relationship of Chikane and Himeko (who is unaware of Chikane’s true feelings for most of the series), and how Chikane, foreseeing the awful fate that awaits either her or Himeko, will do anything and everything necessary to save her beloved’s life, no matter how painful it is or how much she must sacrifice. This series will tie your emotions in knots, but it will all be worth it in the end (just be sure to watch until the VERY end).
This couple has been the source of yuri discussions in the nation of a years. You would not believe how big this show’s thread is, how much has been discussed about this couple, the action portion’s crappiness and the decisions made by both Chikane and Himeko throughout the show.
Believe me when I say that both girls go through the series. Joy, glee, excitement, fear, pain, sorrow, doubt, confusion, rage. You name it, they’ve experienced it.
Like I said about the threads, the discussions on the decisions made by both ladies is quite large. Some feel sympathy while others feel that a different path could have been taken in order to reach the climactic finale. Oh the finale…wow…just…wow. It remains one of the most romantic moments in anime I’ve ever seen. A cheesy setup, but it’s the dialogue spoken that touched my heart. Sure, others may disagree. To each their own, right? the point is that ChiMeko is the main reason to watch this show. this show pretty much defined the phrase “What I would endure for yuri”.

The music: Once again, classical + Yuri. Also, the addition of KOTOKO’s songs increases the coolness of this show’s soundtrack.

The animation: Hit and miss. It’s hard to explain but sometimes it does exceedingly well and other times it doesn’t impress. It’s all about timing with this one.

Characters: The villains of the show are the 7 members of the Orochi. Yes, it is associated with the evil 7 headed dragon. Each of the seven Orochi fit easily into archetypes, consisting of a sociopath criminal, an unintelligent brute, a former Japanese idol, an anti-social mangaka, a catgirl, a seemingly betrayed friend, and a disillusioned nun. They are extremely discordant with each other and do not coordinate attacks on the miko until the middle of the series. that’s all you need to know about the villains. Sure the 1st head and the 7th have a history together but other than that, the other heads don’t do anything special in order to get your attention, except maybe the 2nd head.

Souma Oogami: the male lead who is best known for 1 thing: his manly screaming of Himeko’s name from the top of his lungs. This guy really does yell himeko’s name out loud when she’s in trouble. I do admit that aside from that, he’s not so bad as a male lead. In fact, some fans sympathize with him for all that he’s gone through. I don’t blame them. Even though I’m a ChiMeko fan for life, HimeGami wasn’t that bad while it lasted.

Aside from this guy, there are two other characters worthy of being mentioned because they’re awesome.

Otoha Kisaragi: Chikane’s personal maid, Otoha is loyal and devoted to Chikane. When Himeko comes to live with Chikane, Otoha immediately notices the bond between the pair and grows intensely jealous, angered at Himeko for taking Chikane away from her and hurting her mistress. Aside from playing a humorous role and some very weighty scenes of her own in the series, she is a support character who clarifies how Chikane reserved her feelings for Himeko alone.

Makoto Saotome: Himeko’s friend and roommate, “Mako-chan” is an athletic girl, one of the best runners on the Ototachibana track team. Sure her role is small compared to other characters on the show, but her appearance definitely left an impression on the viewers.

The other characters serve their purpose and no more.

BTW, this is another show where I don’t mind the English Dub at all. It’s good in my opinion. Nothing spectacular but good nevertheless.

In conclusion: For those interested in witnessing a majestic showmanship of an intriguing yuri relationship, watch this show, provided you can stomach the bad mech action in between. Trust me, if you can, you’ll be richly rewarded for your endurance.

52+53 Double Slammy 4: Mai-HiME and Mai-Otome

Hello and welcome to G-Views, where SoL reigns supreme, moe is respected and Dokuro-chan sucks poopie. If there was ever an epitome to action/drama cheesy goodness all piled up in one series, then the Mai franchise would be it. Welcome to my next DS episode, where I’ll be reviewing, Mai-Hime and Mai-Otome. So let’s get it on with Mai-Hime!

Note: in the Otome review, I’ll be making minor references to both the similarities and differences between HiME and Otome. With that said, let’s get ready to rumble!

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