Haiyore Nyaruko-san episodes 1+2 Initial impressions: Hyper Demon, Mr I.M. Boring and KUKO!

There’s supposedly a lesbian in this show, or so I’ve heard. I checked the first two episodes to find out whether this is true. Let’s see:

40 minutes later, this was my facial expression:

So we kick things off with male lead whose name I don’t care about #77 running away from a demon and the loli Nyarlathohep saves him.

To answer EC’s question, do I think Nyaruko is cute? Not really. She’s okay but not cute enough to make go squee.

After Nyaruko’s attention is grabbed by a flung fork, she explains how she’s an alien sent to Earth to defend it and he came to protect male lead from human trafficking evil aliens. Male lead finds it hard to believe a loli is actually one of the demons of Cthulhu mythology. I beg the anime writers sitting cozy on their chairs, please, for the love of Pete, DON’T HAVE MALE LEAD AND NYARUKO FALL FOR EACH OTHER! Don’t make me throw out my lunch. Wait…it looks like she wants him. My reaction:

She promises to maintain both personal and professional affairs separated…but I highly doubt it right now. Anyway they go to an anime store where Nyaruko goes all out making me laugh as she fawns over otaku stuff as ML boringly stops her with his fork.

I’m guessing Nyaruko’s shtick aside from being a hyperactively amusing girl is to drop Engrish words left and right. At least hers is better than all of Symphogear’s combined. So basically the evil aliens want to illegally smuggle otaku goods while the protectors want to both stop and collect for themselves.

More random talk, another demon attacks, more Engrish, sadistic trashing by Nyaruko.

Supposedly this is the girl I’m supposed to be keeping my eyes on. We’ll see what she has to offer.

My reaction to this guy being the male lead:

Some more boring stuff and then another demon attacks. we even get a Pokemon joke. It’s been ages since I’ve seen one those. how nice.

Shanta-kun’s a weenie (another Pokemon joke I guess) and she breaks down I.M. Boring’s sanity using her Unspeakable Bar Thing.

Whatever. Next episode.

The Giant Line. So this show is going to use parody jokes huh? Okay.

So our next episode begins with Nyaruko and I.M. Boring heading R’Lyeh, the Cthulhu mythos capital on top of a sea monster transport. There’s an auction house for banned goods Nyaruko wants to head to for some banned goods.

So the mythological city turns out to be an amusement park…figures.

For once I agree with you I.M. Boring.

Ugh. Show, you’re losing me. WHERE’S THE LESBIAN I WAS PROMISED!?

Nodens, the auction’s mastermind.

Kuko the Chtugha, or the eternal flame.

Kuko dominates Nyaruko and Nodens transports them somewhere private. Okay, here we go. This is what I’ve been waiting for…WILL IT BE WORTH IT!?

So they have a supposedly epic battle, I guess. C’mon, HURRY UP! Beat up Kuko and let’s proceed!

FINALLY! Okay, here we go!

Okay, let’s recap my 3 fundamental rules for a perfect one-sided lesbian. In case you haven’t read my Jormungand 1st Impressions, here they are once again.

1: She’s adorable/attractive or likable, both, or all 3.

2: Her feelings are genuinely pure and not based solely on lust.

3: Even though the chances of her succeeding are incredibly low (Depending on the script), you want to see her succeed anyway. Sometimes it could be a struggle accepting you’re gay and willing to at least try and confess, or it can simply be difficulty in mustering the courage to  confess. There are also examples where your crush knows how you feel, doesn’t take you seriously/denies your love but the woman continues trying till she succeeds.

0:47 explains my reaction.

Kuko: “Let’s come together”

Nyaruko: My heart belongs to the most boring man on the planet Earth.

Me:

Anyway, the rest of the episode doesn’t matter after that. Nyaruko transforms into some Superhero she saw on TV and beats Kuko and I don’t care.

Final thoughts: Other than Kuko almost taking away Nyaruko’s virginity and some decent Nyaruko hyper gags, THIS SHOW’S SOOOOOO BOOOOORIIING! The male lead is bland and uninteresting, Nyaruko is alright but her obsession with ML pisses me off, the jokes amount to little more than parodies, Nyaruko getting bonked or stabbed with a fork off screen when she fawns over I.M. Boring and failing to encourage me into studying the Cthulhu mythos. However, Kuko’s pretty cool (She reminds me of Anna from He Is My Master) and the monsters are decent I guess. I’ll try my best to survive this mainstream borefest for the sake of more Kuko.

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